I happened to attend a wedding two days back. It was a wedding in the family of our close friend in Mumbai. A very simple marriage, a konkani groom and a gujarati bride. The marriage was performed in konkani style. What struck me was the simplicity with which the bride came for the ceremony. Just one gold chain, and one necklace; very few bangles; no head ornaments like chutti etc. I don't think, there was any modern excessive make-up on the face. After a long long time, i am seeing a bride who is doing the marriage ritual as herself. Generally gujarati's are known for extravagant shows and abundant demonstration of wealth. Though i wrote this, i don't believe that such characteristics of 'vulgar display of wealth' can be associated with any community. At that time I remembered a wedding reception that I attended at Chennai, more than 20 years back, where I saw the bride and the groom in very simple attire. Bride with a typical kerala saree, and groom too with matching attire. I thought I will never see a bride and groom in such a simple style any more.
These are the days, where marriages are conducted with a primary (but hidden) objective of excessive demonstration of riches. The bride generally becomes a model for jewellery showrooms and saree houses. The expensive wedding sarees were not even worn once a year afterwards. I have heard arguments from many people against my way of thinking. Their arguments were: its a special day, once in a life occasion, you have to look your best, etc. etc. I agree all that. But one can be at the best when one is self. I think, too much of transformation transforms the self too. Make up do help in bringing up a good glow on face. But what puts me off is the vulgar display of wealth. I know, these days more people would not agree with me.
I got a bit excited when I saw the simplicity... that too in a marriage in Mumbai.. and a gujarati bride too... Thought, i would express my excitement in my own way in My Musings...
About Me
- Rajeev S
- Mumbai, Maharashtra, India
- Likings: Simple life, Music - classical variety - Bansuri, Sitar and Tabla, Nature, Architect software solutions, Write computer programs, Spend time with family, son, daughter, sisters, nephews and nieces... and grand nephews and grand niece...
6 comments:
Extravagances and indulgences have become inevitable in human society today. It makes one forget to live.Marriages which need to be divine expressions are dragged down to the level of human shows of wealth.Simple weddings are a rarity today.
Agree with you nandu, they have become inevitable in society today. I don't agree that marriages need to be divine expressions, i believe, they are to be social expressions, in which two individuals supported by their respective families formally agree to be together in times of joy and sorrow. Somehow i don't see any divinity coming int o that. If in everything that we do if see divinity, then yes agree with you. The extravagance and indulgences take away the sanctity of such an occasions.
Marriages today as you point out have become occasions for the parents to show of their wealth. However, i feel that this trend will slowly change as youngsters become more asserive in deciding how their marriages should be conducted rather than allow their parents to make it a show of material wealth. I think it will be much better if the couple take the money that will be spend and invest it for their future life together.
I wish I am able to pull of such a simple .. but very beautiful wedding :D ... being a gujrati .. i really know that its an uphill task :D.
i thorughly subscribe to your idea that a wedding should be a simple affair ... however, i don't quite agree with the idea that marriages are merely meant to be social expressions ... divine blessings are surely an essential factor ...I happened to witness an "ideal wedding" a few days back at the famous Krishna temple in "Ambalapuzha" ....the bride and groom in simple traditional kerala dress exchanged vows and garlands in front of the sanctum sanctorium ...a lamp was lit and only the immediate relatives a few well wishers attended .... no pomp, no unecessary expenses ....the striking factors being the sincerity of all present and the simplicity of the function as such.... even the onlookers involuntarily happened to bless/pray for the couple ....this is how it should be .... don't u think so? ....
I wish this article was posted in the national newspaper - point to be noted
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